64 More Ways to Survive SOLDIER
by Luddles
Summary: Continuation of '100 Ways to Survive SOLDIER'. 64 tiny stories, all revolving around the first class of SOLDIER and how exactly they manage to stay  somewhat  sane.


**Disclaimer: Apparently I don't own FFVII. It's not really news to me.**

**A/N: I FOUND ANOTHER PROMPTS LIST. So get ready for our favorite SOLDIERS to do 64 more ridiculous things. Again, this is semi-AU and headcanon-filled and all that jazz.**

**64 More Ways to Survive SOLDIER**

1. 2 A.M.:

Angeal woke to someone very heavy sitting on his legs and midsection. Was that a knee in his gut? "Get off me," he snapped at whoever was kneeling on top of him. "And come back in the morning."

"I'm _sorry_, Angeal, but Genesis and Sephiroth already kicked me out and I can't get in my room. I lost my key."

"For heaven's sake, Zack, it's two A.M.! You know… just go to sleep."

2. Metaphor:

At one point or another, everyone got the feeling that everything Genesis said was a metaphor. He replied that only every other thing he said was a metaphor, and the rest were blatant insults.

3. Sky:

"Your puppy seems depressed," Genesis noted.

"I think I need to take him outside of Midgar," Angeal said, "I get depressed stuck here too. You can never see the sky through the clouds."

4. Lost scene:

It must have been an hour since Genesis started talking about the lost final scene of LOVELESS. Zack had fallen asleep, Sephiroth was reading, and Angeal was the only one still paying a minute amount of attention.

5. Degrees:

There were different degrees of angry with Sephiroth. There was his mild annoyance at anything Genesis or Zack did to tick him off, severe frustration when Lazard called him up at all hours of the night to send him on missions, and finally, the terrifying kind of fury that only Sephiroth could feel towards someone he hated. Usually Hojo.

6. Seize the day:

"We're going swimming," Genesis announced on the first day it got above seventy degrees during their holiday in Banora (Genesis and Angeal outvoted Sephiroth and Zack).

"Ugh, no, I just want to lie here all day," Sephiroth said. "I don't like the heat or the water."

"Oh, come on, Sephiroth, you have to do _something_," Genesis replied, "we're not leaving a single day of this break un-seized."

7. Opposite:

The opposite of Genesis was sanity, or so Sephiroth thought.

8. Passions run:

"I feel like passion ran away with him to a magical land full of classic literature and poetry."

"So he hasn't stopped quoting that play?"

"He has not."

9. Connection:

Angeal thought that sometimes it felt good just being in the presence of his best friends. It made him remember that they still had a deep connection after so many years of fighting together and just being there for each other. It was something unbreakable.

10. Lull and storm:

Mako had a number of known side effects. For instance, it gave Sephiroth a fever every time he had a treatment, and made Genesis sleepy for the day afterwards. Some of the side effects lasted longer than others, and they varied in degrees of severity.

Genesis had nasty mood swings for at least a week.

They tended to make everyone want to kill him for at least a week as well.

11. Animal:

"You act like some kind of uncivilized animal when you eat, Zack," Genesis said disgustedly one night at dinner.

Zack raised an eyebrow. "Don't sit across from me, then."

12. Children:

Angeal and Zack were good with kids. When the Firsts had to rescue a group of children from a building that collapsed in the slums, the two black-haired SOLDIERs basically kept everything together, easily consoling the distraught little ones and making them smile despite whatever injuries they had. Sephiroth would have found it very touching, had Genesis not been complaining about the "noisy little snots" in his ear the whole time.

13. We all float on:

Zack was humming the song under his breath. He hadn't expected Genesis to start singing it.

14. Chess:

"Angeeaaaal," Zack whined, like a lonely puppy who needed attention. Angeal and Sephiroth were in the middle of a chess game, and when they played chess, neither of them paid any mind to anything else.

15. Duty:

Genesis remembered one of his first missions as a First Class. Sephiroth had been nearly killed, and instead of finishing the mission, Genesis rescued him, almost compromising the operation. Sephiroth tore him out for it later, telling him that it was his duty to finish the mission, not to worry about his friend.

Genesis could have slapped him.

16. Rip

"You tore a muscle?"

"Ugh… yes… remind me to stretch before running off into a fight against that big blue dragon of Genesis's."

17. Missing time:

"You know, Genesis, every day you sleep in, you're missing time you could be annoying all of us by quoting LOVELESS," Sephiroth noted with a maniacal grin. Sometimes, he really loved trolling Genesis.

18. Crest:

On April Fool's Day one year, Zack put toothpaste instead of frosting on cupcakes. Sephiroth was the only one who was fooled into eating one, and since then, he avoided Crest toothpaste like the plague.

19. Itch:

"Zack, you do realize that if you put itching powder in the laundry, it will get in _your _clothes as well."

It was one of the many times Zack called Angeal a 'fun-sucker', even though Angeal was just trying to help him avoid a horrible fate.

20. Explode:

"Wait, Genesis got sent on a mission with the annoying half of the third class?"

"Yes. I'm surprised he hasn't blown up Lazard's office yet."

Zack and Sephiroth walked past the director's office, and realized that Sephiroth had, for once, been wrong.

21. Rise:

"I stand by all previous claims," said Angeal, "that waking Genesis up is torture."

22. Crumble:

Genesis shrugged apathetically. "That's just the way the cookie crumbles."

Zack jumped over the back of the couch and grabbed Genesis by the front of his turtleneck. "WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY COOKIE!"

23. Range:

Swords were horrible for long-range fighting, unless you were Sephiroth and had a seven-foot-long one.

24. Fight/flight:

"Wait, there are two options when you fight?"

Angeal rolled his eyes. "Yes, Zack. You can do something other than fighting. You know, like running away?"

25. Acid:

Sephiroth fidgeted for a while, wringing his hands and shuffling his feet, not daring to look at the man in front of him. He bit his lip, sighed, and finally rolled his eyes upward, staring at a very smug Genesis. "Okay, you were right."

Genesis laughed, a mocking sound that made Sephiroth's eyebrows narrow. "Goodness, Seph, how does _that_ taste coming out of your mouth?"

"Quite acidic," Sephiroth replied, his words sounding just as bitter as they felt.

26. Color:

Zack seemed determined that it was impossible not to have a favorite color. Sephiroth told him that, in all honesty, he didn't really have one. Zack went to Angeal first, but finally got it out of Genesis: Sephiroth's favorite color was color itself. As long as something wasn't the boring grays and whites of the science labs he grew up in, it was a pleasure to his eyes.

Unless, of course, it was mako-green.

27. Give:

Once, when Zack stole Genesis's photo album of very embarrassing pictures of Angeal and Sephiroth when they were younger, Angeal ordered him to give it much like one would an unruly dog. It wasn't really a surprise when Zack obeyed.

28. Needle:

Genesis and Zack both shared an innate dislike of needles. In fact, they were both downright afraid of them. They just kind of got used to it after getting injection after injection from the science department.

29. Locks:

Zack tended to lock himself out of everything. Usually because he either lost keys or put them inside the thing he was trying to get into. Whenever it happened, he got Genesis or Sephiroth, because both of them could pick locks faster than he could tell them how he'd gotten locked out.

30. Slope:

Sephiroth was one of the most coordinated people that any of the Firsts knew, except when skiing. He tumbled down the slopes like an oversized, silver-haired snowball.

31. Correspondence:

Every time they went on missions, Zack sent Aerith a letter almost every day. Every time Sephiroth saw Zack writing, he wondered two things. Why did Zack have such a stupid look on his face, and how could Aerith even read his messy handwriting?

32. Linger:

"What are you up to, Genesis?" Sephiroth asked the redhead, who was lingering outside the science department's front door one afternoon.

"Angeal's puppy has his mako injection today," Genesis replied, nonchalantly examining his fingernails. Sephiroth could tell that he was worried about something, casual as he tried to act.

"So you're waiting for him?"

"He's busy right now."

"You can be hilariously sweet sometimes," Sephiroth said, but he decided to wait with Genesis anyways.

33. Charm:

All of the Firsts were charming in their own way. Angeal was gruff, but sweet underneath it all, easily admitting that he liked dogs and gardening. Genesis was a flirt in every sense of the word, quoting poetry and sending flowers to girls almost every weekend. Sephiroth was socially awkward, but his looks got him far, and he could be nice when he wanted. Zack may have been the most charming of all, but it usually failed on every girl he met.

Well, except Aerith.

34. Roads:

Genesis had a very annoying habit of feeling the need to drive at breakneck speed every time he got in a car. No matter how much Angeal and Sephiroth yelled at him to stop, he just kept going. Angeal swore that he was going to get in a car accident someday, but he did it anyway.

35. Hunger:

"_How_ does one kid _eat_ so much!"

"Hey, I'm still growing! You probably ate a lot when you were a teenager, too, Genesis!"

"Not as much as you! You're like a hungry puppy!"

36. Reciprocity:

Zack gave Sephiroth a withering look. "You just like using words I can't understand, don't you?"

"Yeah, it's a little amusing. Reciprocity for all the times you tell me how awkward I am around girls."

"…Ugh. I really don't like when you like to be snarky."

37. Kind:

There were times, usually when Zack was fighting with all his heart and completely lost in anger that Angeal wasn't sure what kind of man or beast Zack Fair was. It kind of scared him.

38. Fruity:

"'Sup?" Zack asked, flopping onto the couch next to a disgruntled-looking Sephiroth.

"Oh, just wishing Genesis would stop smelling my hair."

39. Half-life:

Zack was a smart kid, but with the way he was confused by radioactive dating, Sephiroth did not want to ever explain half-lives to him again. Not to mention the fact that the only kind of dating Zack was interesting in involved Aerith Gainsborough.

40. Comedy of errors:

Genesis had always loved theater, involving himself deeply in the dramatic personae that came with it. But when he looked at his own life, it seemed more ridiculous than any comedy. Then again, it was more twisted than anything most playwrights could even imagine.

41. Tragedy:

It was ridiculous how, after seeing so many battles, being genetically experimented on, taking lives with his own hands, and nearly losing the people he cared for most on a number of occasions, losing his earring was such a tragedy for Genesis Rhapsodos.

42. Hope is the thing with feathers:

As Sephiroth gazed dismally at his black wing, he mused that the poet had been wrong entirely.

43. Empire:

One of the strangest things Angeal had seen his best friend do was the time they went to the beach and Genesis built a sand kingdom, of which he named himself emperor.

44. Turpentine kisses and mistaken blows:

"Her kisses are full of bitterness and I _swear_ she hits me more often than she hugs me."

"Reno, I'd say that's a dysfunctional relationship."

"Shut it, Fair, just because your girlfriend is adorable and wouldn't hurt a fly…"

45. Rings:

Zack was eager as always, but he drooped a little when he noticed the dark rings around Angeal's eyes. "You really did stay up all night worrying about them, didn't you?" he asked. Angeal put his arm around Zack's shoulders and squeezed him for a second.

"I do the same for you, you know."

46. Dust:

"I hate the desert," Zack complained, "It's all dusty and hot… I feel like I'm gonna melt."

"Suck it up," Sephiroth ordered, "I'm wearing more clothes and I have more hair than you, and I'm not complaining."

Neither Genesis nor Angeal decided to mention that was because Sephiroth was like a human icicle.

47. Every you, every me:

There were only three people Angeal could really promise anything to. And to them, he promised everything and for them, he would give everything. And in return, he was certain they would do the same.

48. Project:

Before meeting Genesis and Angeal, Sephiroth had only been referred to as a project. The scientists saw him as their work, but they saw him as a person. He grew to detest the word "project" because he wasn't anyone's anymore.

49. Adore:

"He looks at her with so much adoration, it's sickening," Sephiroth complained, pulling a face as he watched Zack and Aerith.

"You're just depressed because you don't have girlfriend," Genesis replied. Sephiroth's look darkened significantly, mostly because Genesis was right.

50. Murmur:

There were a number of occasions on which Sephiroth awoke during a mission to a certain redhead pressed up against him, murmuring incomprehensible things into the night. Every time, he wished Genesis would stop moving around in his sleep, but he couldn't find it in himself to make him move.

51. Above:

Looking down at the city from the dizzying height of the SOLDIER floor was not something Angeal ever got used to. He wasn't really fond of the idea of being above everything in the world, and would rather have his feet on solid ground.

52. Below:

"Look out below!" Zack shouted, proceeding to land directly on Genesis's head.

He went on to later say that he had given Genesis fair warning, after all.

Genesis disagreed.

53. Incalculable:

Sephiroth always gave his enemies the same cold, calculating stare. But whatever went on behind those bright green eyes was incalculable in and of itself.

54. Wire:

One of the more curious things that Zack was talented at was walking on tightropes. Sephiroth didn't understand how the boy, who tripped over his own feet more often than not, could walk along a wire like it was nothing at all. That is, until he realized that the only reason Zack could do it was that he wasn't really perturbed when he looked down.

55. Landslide:

Anyone who saw Angeal's impeccably neat home (albeit covered in potted plants) would have no idea that his office was a literal landslide of paperwork.

56. The beginning is the end is the beginning:

"So… it's kind of cyclical, okay? The end of one story is the beginning of another one," Genesis explained.

"Kind of sounds like us," Angeal pointed out. "You should figure out who the author of those books is, and if they're stalking us."

57. Door:

Sephiroth was the kind of person who would just slam the door if he saw a wet, dejected, sad puppy or kitten sitting outside, and Genesis was much the same. Angeal was the kind of person who would take the animal inside, wrap it up in towels, and try to find the owner, all while hoping he wouldn't _really_ find them, so he could keep the pet. That was how he ended up with Zack.

58. Enemy gate:

Zack was far too fond of just barreling straight inside the gates to whatever fortress they were invading and going on a murderous rampage. Angeal decided he was teaching him a thing or two about stealth.

59. Stone:

There was little contest. Sephiroth had the best poker face in the world.

60. Bright:

"Will you turn the lights off?" Genesis groaned, "I have a migraine and it's killing me."

"The lights aren't on, Gen, you just looked at my eyes," Sephiroth mumbled in reply, deciding it would be better to leave the room until the both of them recovered from whatever Hojo was pumping into their bloodstream this week.

61. Stories:

Zack liked fairy tales, Genesis liked tragedies, Sephiroth was fond of mysteries, and Angeal held a secret fondness for the kind of touching stories forty-year-old women read. To all of them, stories were an escape from the nightmare they sometimes felt they lived in.

62. Chime:

Some days, there was little Sephiroth liked less than the cheerful chiming of his doorbell. Genesis called him misanthropic; he called himself "not a people-person." Angeal told them it was the same thing.

63. Laugh:

The days when Sephiroth laughed, not just chuckling when he won a battle, but _really_ laughed, made everyone else cheer up a little. That was because Sephiroth had the most gorgeous laugh most people had ever heard in their life, he just never did it.

64. Hold:

"There are three things you need to do to survive SOLDIER," Zack told Cloud once, "Always wake up on time, don't cross the Firsts when they look like they're in a bad mood, and _keep as tight a hold on your sanity as physically possible_."


End file.
